11 yrs in the LS and he wants out, i don't, how do we not break the marriage over this

i need this typed out before i talk to him again. f44 m46, married 17 yrs, in LS since 2014. it was both of our idea originally, we've been in it together fully, regulars, clubs, travel, the whole story. last month over a glass of wine on our porch he said he thinks he's done. not "let's take a break" — he said he thinks he doesn't want to do it anymore. like at all. he was calm not angry, no specific trigger, just said it's been slowly shifting for him for over a year and he's finally clear about it. he said he loves me, he loves our marriage, he loves the friendships we've built. he just doesnt want to keep doing the playing part. and i... still want to do it. i love it. it's part of how i feel alive. i love our circle, i love our travel pattern, i love the version of me that exists in the LS. i was honestly looking forward to the next decade in it. so now we have the asymmetric exit problem. ppl talk about asymmetric ENTRIES (one wants to start, one doesnt) all the time but you almost never hear ppl talk about asymmetric EXITS in long term LS couples. and i feel completely alone on this. like i can't talk to our LS friends bc they're part of the thing he wants out of. i can't talk to vanilla friends bc they don't know. is it possible to navigate this without one of us giving up something fundamental. like is there a middle path or does someone always lose. has anyone gotten through an asymmetric exit and stayed solid. and how do i not become resentful of him for ending something i loved. or him resent me for needing to grieve it loudly in front of him. ive been crying on and off for a week and he's being patient but i can tell its hard for him too