after she gets home from a date with him... what's YOUR debrief ritual

F37 / M39, hotwife dynamic 2.5 yrs, we have a couple of regulars i see semi monthly. weve developed a debrief ritual that took us about a year to land on and i want to know what other hotwife couples do because i feel like ours is unusual. ours goes like this. when i get home from a date or hotel night, dh is already in bed with the lamp on. i shower (his idea, he says it kind of marks the transition). i come to bed in one of his old tshirts. and we talk for like an hour, just lying there facing each other. he doesnt ask questions, he lets me decide what to tell. sometimes i tell everything in detail, sometimes i just say what i felt. then we fall asleep, and the next morning over coffee theres usually a second smaller debrief where the questions come out. i feel like this is the most intimate thing weve built in 15 years of marriage. its more intimate than sex tbh. and i didnt expect that. whats your ritual. does the shower thing happen for you too. is the next-morning second debrief common. how long after she gets home do you have THE talk, immediately or sleep first then process. and is there a couple where the ritual goes the other way, where she wants to talk immediately and the husband wants to sleep first, how do you reconcile