bottom dysphoria + same-room play, how do you actually navigate it

this might be too granular for here but i'm gonna ask anyway because i've had like 3 false starts and i need new ideas. trans woman, pre any bottom surgery, in a stable thing with a cis male partner, both of us bi-ish. same-room play is something we both want but every time it gets close my dysphoria spikes and i tap out, usually before the other party is even in the room. partner is endlessly patient about it but i hate that the pattern is becoming a pattern. anyone got mental tricks, positions, sequences, lighting choices, anything that helped you stop the spiral mid-scene? in edinburgh if any local insight is going...