ex hillsong aussie couple unlearning purity culture by going into the lifestyle, is this the most cliche deconstruction story or is it just our actual life

right so my wife and i are both 37, brisbane based, both raised in hillsong-adjacent megachurches in the 90s and 00s, both fully out of the church for about 7 yrs now. we got married at 22, virgins on the wedding night, the whole "purity culture" 2000s evangelical childhood package — true love waits rings at 14, "every mans battle" books being handed to me at 16, my wife being told her body was a stumbling block from primary school. you know the drill. we walked away from it all in our early 30s for the usual reasons (the politics, the cover ups, the genuine intellectual dishonesty of the whole thing) and weve been on the scene now for about 18 months. mostly couples meets in brisbane and one trip down to a sydney club last winter. the thing is, going into the LS has done more for unlearning purity culture than 5 yrs of deconstruction podcasts and the one therapist did combined. like literally being in a room with other consenting adults who are kind to each others bodies and to my wifes body in particular has done something the books never did. my wife told me last month she feels "not dirty" for the first time in her life and i nearly cried in the car. but heres my worry. is this just the most cliche post-evangelical pendulum swing in the book. did we go from one extreme into another bc we didnt have the patience to find a middle. or is the LS actually the right medicine for this specific wound and the cliche is true bc the pattern is real. anyone else out of evangelical purity culture who landed here as part of the unwind, what do you reckon...