fibro + the lifestyle... how do you pace ur body so u can actually enjoy a night of play

40s woman in scotland, fibromyalgia for about 8 yrs now. me and husband got into the lifestyle last year and i love it but the flares afterwards are brutal. like 3 day write-off level. and during play i sometimes have to stop because a position triggers a pain spike out of nowhere. partners have been kind but i can tell they dont always get it. how do you fibro folks pace a play night... is it preload rest, postload rest, both? do you tell partners in advance to expect pauses? feeling guilty that i need so much "managing"

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