how i introduced my mastectomy scars in the lifestyle and what im still figuring out

im 41, had a double in 2022, reconstruction in 2023, scars are still pretty visible. dh and i came back to the lifestyle about 9 months ago after a long pause. the first like 4 connections i kept a bra or top on for a long part of the night and only revealed later or in lower light. felt protective but also like i was hiding part of myself. last month i went into a meet basically saying upfront "fyi i had a mastectomy, scars are part of the package" and the couple was incredibly chill and it ended up being one of the best nights we've had. now im second guessing whether i should always lead w it or only when it feels right. for those of u with surgical scars (mastectomy, top surgery, c section, anything visible) how do u handle the timing of the reveal... do u tell ppl before they meet u, do u just let them see, do u disclose only when things are heading somewhere physical. and how do u handle the rare jerk who reacts badly