stag/vixen 4 yrs and i dont feel like its made us stronger... has anyone's NOT improved?

M44 / F40, stag vixen since 2022. she has one regular she sees monthly and a couple of occasional guys. we have a clear dynamic, communication is fine, jealousy is managed. heres my question that nobody seems to answer honestly. every single post i read online is "our marriage is stronger than ever, this saved us, we are closer than the day we got married". like every single one. and ngl... ours isnt. its not WORSE. that needs to be said. we havent damaged anything. we love each other, we have sex, we co-parent well, we like each other. but its also not noticeably better. we're basically the same couple we were in 2022 just with this extra activity in our lives. the "we are closer than ever" narrative does not describe us. and i feel like im not allowed to say that anywhere because everyone in the community is competing to be the success story. but statistically not everyone can be the deeper-bond couple, some of us are just... fine. neutrally fine. has anyone been doing this for years and feels neutral or only mildly positive about its impact on the relationship. is "neutral" a valid outcome or does it mean were doing it wrong. is the "stronger than ever" thing real or is it the social media version of swinger marriages