we started soft only... 14 months before anything went further. patience pays off? reading posts here where ppl jump straight to full swap on night one stresses me out tbh. me and my wife agreed soft only at the start and stuck to it for over a year. just kissing and touching in the same room, going home, talking about it for days after. some nights we'd come home and not even do anything just lie there processing. eventually one night at a club in manchester it felt right and we both knew without saying. is the slow burn approach undervalued in this scene? feel like everyone online is chasing the wildest story but the slow build saved our marriage imo