we trusted the wrong couple in month 3... the lesson

so this happened to us in cork last autumn and im sharing because i wish someone had warned us. we'd been on the apps maybe 12 weeks, very keen, very green. met a couple who were super charming, lots of texting, voice notes, the works. they invited us to theirs for dinner and a soft play night. red flags i missed in hindsight... they wouldnt video call before, his profile pics were all from 2019, she barely engaged on text it was mostly him. we went anyway because we'd "invested" in the chat. the night wasnt unsafe but it was clearly his thing and she was just going along with it. we left at 11. what were the red flags you wish you'd trusted...