when there's been any kink in a swap, who actually does the aftercare... me, her husband, the four of us together

this one keeps coming up in our group chat with other LS couples weve been talking to and nobody quite agrees so i wanted to throw it out wider. context: couple early forties, LS 5 yrs, started adding light kink (cuffs, blindfolds, bit of impact, occasional light D/s) to swap scenes in the past 18 months. on a normal vanilla swap aftercare is straightforward — once we're back in our own room or the car, my dh and i are each others' aftercare, the other couple is each others, everyone goes home, easy. but on the nights where the kink layer has been intense — particularly D/s or impact play — the person whos been on the receiving end is sometimes in a noticeably different state when the scene ends. like a bit floaty, sometimes a bit teary, sometimes very chatty, sometimes very quiet. and the question of WHO handles that is more complicated than i realised when we got into this. ive had moments where my husband's play partner clearly needed her husband to come hold her but he was busy with me. ive had moments where ive needed my husband and hes been mid-scene with someone else. and ive had moments where the four of us ended up in a sort of group cuddle on a sofa for 30 min while everyone landed and that was... actually really lovely but weird to talk about afterwards. so how do you guys do this. is the rule that each couple does their own aftercare always, even if it means leaving someone wobbly for 20 min while their partner finishes. is it ok for the play partner (i.e. the person you just did the scene with) to hold you down from sub space briefly before handing you back to your spouse. or is the group-aftercare thing legitimate and i should stop feeling weird about it. genuinely no clue what the consensus is here