why did connecting with another wife feel so different than connecting with a man

so... last night. me and dh swapped with another couple weve been seeing on and off for a few months, full swap, separate rooms. her husband is lovely and the sex was great honestly no complaints. but earlier in the evening she and i had been on the sofa just chatting and somewhere in there she put her head on my shoulder and we ended up making out for nearly an hour. and the WEIRD bit is, when i think back on the night the bit i keep replaying isnt the full swap with her husband its her head on my shoulder. her laugh. the way she kissed me like she wasnt in a hurry. is this just because its newer? am i developing a crush on her? is this what bi people mean when they say its different with women or am i making something out of nothing because i had two glasses of wine